10 Reasons Why I’d Love to “Magically” Improve My Climbing

Yes, that is me in the center with fake “puffy” biceps, wishing I was strong enough to send. Photo: Elijah Luna

Most days I wish I was better at climbing. Even on the days I happen to send, I often secretly wish I was topping out something harder, not just for the V points or glory, but because breaking into V8 and 5.13 would allow me to send–or at least productively hang-dog–so many amazing routes. Now you might think this would motivate me to begin a 6-week power-endurance training cycle or finally learn to haul myself up a campus board, but most days my true inner feelings are:

Screw the method, the climb, the journey, the struggle to the top, and every other cliche “it’s about the journey not the end result” saying: I want results. Now.

Basically I want to magically get better at climbing. Here’s why:

ONE: Sending is fun and an amazing feel-good ego boost. Not sending is less fun and harder on the ego.

TWO: Training sucks. It’s hard. And I’ve never had anywhere near as much fun destroying my abs on the TRX as I do climbing outside.

THREE: I might have a chance at scoring an Enormocast interview.

FOUR: I’d have significantly more Instagram followers if I could post rad pictures of me sending 5.14.

FIVE: Sponsors. Who doesn’t like free stuff? But who is going to sponsor a 5.12-draw-pulling champion? No one.

SIX: I’ve gotten bored of my current plateau.

SEVEN: It’s way cooler to be the girl flashing 5.13c on the gym’s overhung lead wall than the girl top rope flailing on the all-pink 5.12b.

EIGHT: Building a training schedule is time consuming. I’d rather not.

NINE: I’d finally have a few good #moonboard videos.

TEN: Life is short, so why not tick off as many hard routes/problems as possible?

5 Comments Add yours

  1. allezgirl says:

    Ditto on that entire list. Training does suck… why can’t we just be great at climbing all of a sudden?? Also, I would love to be sponsored and just climb for a living. Oh, that would be wonderful 🙂 Random side note, I wrote a post about the IFSC now charging viewers to watch their live streams (including the World Cup Circuit). I was just curious what you thought of that! If you have an opinion at all, I’d love to hear from you here: http://allezgirl.com/2017/04/05/ifsc-live-streaming-no-longer-free/ Thanks 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Liz Haas says:

      Too bad if we were all great at climbing, no one would actually be good at climbing 😉 And, honestly, I have never watched a live stream all the way through, but I think it’s a huge mistake that will just result in a lot of climbers no longer watching/supporting the Circuit (and little monetary gains for the IFSC).

      Liked by 1 person

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